my birthday is august 16th

Every year sand drips from the hourglass.
Every year people meet the loves of their lives.
Every year people get their hearts ripped from their chests.

When I was 16 I asked for a party. We debated the logistics and the funds, and after yielding to a compromise, you crossed your arms and jaunted your face.
"And when IS your birthday?"

That year I fell in love with a boy whose listlessness reflected my own.
I spent 17 years waiting to be loved and I'll spend 17 more.

guilt

You’re too scared and ashamed to speak the truth. The words get as far as a sidestep in your mind before you drink them away. You think you’ll break me with the same tongue with which you spoke false deliverance. Your silence was never a comfort; why would it be now?
The true disservice is the lack of faith. In me. In yourself. In the inscrutable plans of the universe.
You said the sky would rain knives before anything turned out right, but the only cuts I got were from you. Yet here I am; hands outstretched and heart shielded. I am your friend. Not a victim of your humanity, nor a toy boxed away. Let me go. Face yourself. Clean your fucking room.

When the inspiration strikes..

I want to redefine my worries with refined writing.

I want I want I want.

My stare is set on stars but I falter at the end of stairs.

"I'm sad and alone, I'm sad and alone, I'm sadly alone,"

>Anger at my primitive consciousness.

>Anger at my premature conclusions.

>Anger at my problematic consensus for psychological catastrophe.

These words don't mean shit but I do.

So where the fuck are you?

one.

my entire life has been compromised of feelings i can't commit to.
my father was my first love.
my lungs are filled with
                                    smoke.

i am the moss that grows in shadow.
people seek me simply to guide them home.
the only thing i want is to have something to say.


my lungs are filled with smoke.

i cannot breathe but i can see.

i see you dance

i see you play

i envy your rhythm

i envy your ease

i wish it were me.